Posted on July 14th, 2011
I think Long Island Porgies are super. They are a “great eatin’ fish” and also cheap as hell. Porgies aren’t persnickety or pretentious. They aren’t picky about where they live, as long as it’s on the Eastern Seaboard. They aren’t overfished and they live for many, many moons. They like to spawn in the in weedy areas near Massachusetts and, unlike most other fish, they like to do so during the small hours of the morning (hubba hubba). They taste really sweet because they feed on mollusks and small fish using their molar-like teeth to grind through shells and bones. Porgies are browsers and grazers; they are known to wait patiently to feed until something especially palatable meanders by. As you can see, although they haunt some of the same Coney Island boardwalks, porgy eating habits are, in fact, much different from those of 6-year-reigning-hot-dog-eating-champion-of-the-world Takaru Kobayashi. However, I do believe that if porgies were capable of having an opinion on the matter, they would agree with me when I say that Takaru is pretty gross but still wicked radical.